We are led to believe that in order to be a real man it is essential to get ahead at any cost, to have lots of money, to accumulate as many material objects as possible including the best “kicks,” fast & flashy cars, big homes and to sleep with as many women as possible (or at least b.s. other men that we have), to puff out our chests and talk trash about others just so that we can perceive that we are better than “them,” when in reality that’s what makes us “them.”  There is nothing wrong with having and enjoying material goods – it’s when we compete with our male counterparts in order to get ahead at any cost is where the conflict lies. When we spend money we don’t have just to possess and show off our latest toy, when we get involved with substance abuse, violence, criminal activities, when we hang out with bad influences, lie, cheat, steal, exhibit abusive behavior – these paths can only lead us into dark spaces and land us in one form of prison or another. We are “them” every time we disrespect our women and that means ANY woman. Walking down the street in Manhattan I’ve witnessed countless acts of cowardice and disrespect by “macho men” hawking (an insult to hawks) and making inappropriate comments to women who are passing by. When we admire the beauty and form of women in a respectful way and communicate in a language that speaks truth and connection – then we are worthy to engage in healthy, meaningful and fulfilling relationships with women. We can then co-create relationships that listen to what we each need and build upon mutual respect and understanding. As warrior men we understand the power of being in service to the women in our lives, not as servants, rather as men!

Remembering that just like we men can get derailed and set on a dark path, not living as our best and highest selves, women too who have not been guided, supported and nurtured can also find themselves lost, confused and unfulfilled. When we have learned how to respect and balance the sacred feminine and divine masculine within ourselves we can lead much more happy and meaningful lives with our partners and have a positive affect on all of our relationships.


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